A place to clear my head…

Unanswered questions

Although my brain is about 70% song lyrics and movie quotes, and I suffer from a semi-severe self diagnosed case of ADD, I consider myself to be a fairly intelligent person.  I understand a lot about life and about people, but one thing that I don’t think I’ll ever understand is human behavior.  Sometimes I think I would love to have the ability to read minds, but then I remember that if I could do that I would realize people don’t think I’m half as awesome as I think I am, and that would make me really sad.  Still though…  I would love to know what makes people tick.  What causes them to make the choices they make?

How do three siblings, all raised in the same household, develop completely different personalities and character traits?  How do two of them develop crippling drug habits and the third not?  How does one manage to see positive in every situation no matter how bad it is, and one have an absolute hatred for life and everything about it?  I feel bad for people who hold onto their anger and hate.  The people who can’t see the good in anything.  I understand life isn’t always sunshine and rainbows but it’s not really that bad is it?  I can’t be that naive…  I absolutely try to see positive in every negative situation, because if I let my anger and hatred consume me, I’ll lose all the things about me that make me who I am.  And I’m pretty awesome.  No ones life is perfect, but that’s not really a reason to stop living right?

Another thing I don’t understand is couples.  Maybe I’ve been single for too long, but I don’t understand why people seem to lose their individual self when they become a couple.  Why does “I” have to become “we”?  Call me crazy but I think it’s perfectly okay to maintain your singular identity while being in a relationship.  When I’m talking to you and ask “How are you?”  I don’t expect to get a “We are doing great!” response.  I asked how YOU were doing.  You are still one person right?  I think this is one of the reasons I sabotage most chances at a relationship.  I like myself too much.  I don’t want to become a we.  I want to stay a me.  Because me is awesome.  Is that normal?  I generally don’t strive for normalcy, but I don’t want to be too weird.

Last but not least is social media behavior.  I have fallen victim to the black hole that is Facebook, so I’m not going to take an anti-social media stance.  What I don’t understand is people who feel the need to post every detail about everything in their life on Facebook or Twitter.  I look at the things some of my friends post and I often wonder how I’m friends with these people.  Some of them really are bat shit insane, no matter how normal they seem otherwise.  I can not stand that people air all their drama for the world to see.  I don’t care that you’re upset and pissed off because your boyfriend/girlfriend cheated on you for the 728th time.  If you keep taking them back then you deserve it, and I don’t need to read about it every 12 days.  I could care less what your asshole distant relative did to piss your cat off.  It doesn’t affect my life in any way.  Find something to be happy about and stop bogging people down with your problems.  It just makes you an attention whore.  Lastly, my page is my page.  If I want to say “fuck”, I’m gonna say it.  Don’t lecture me about “You’re a mom, you shouldn’t talk like that.”  Yes.  I am a mom.  I am a mom and I say fuck.  A lot.  Get over it.  It’s been said a thousand times, if you don’t like what’s on my page, don’t look at it.  It will not hurt my feelings if you delete me…    I know this seemingly contradicts my previous statement about not being a whiny bitch all the time, but it really is a totally different situation…  That may have made more sense in my head?




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